Why is rejection so hard on a person? Have you ever stopped and wondered why the opinion of another human even matters? Speaking for myself, rejection is always so hard me. It doesn’t matter if the rejection is coming from a man (in the romantic aspect), a new friendship, a new career I really wanted, it all sucks equally. They say rejections is “God’s way of saying wrong way”. Well “they” say a lot of shit that doesn’t make life easier to handle. Yet we continue to strive for the acceptance of others, we push ourselves to accomplish more, we work so hard to prove we are good enough. Yet how many of us actually accept our selves for who we are? How many of us even like ourselves? I can say I don’t feel that way about myself all the time. I struggle too! Perfect example, today I received a call informing me that the job I had just interviewed for I did not get. Ouch. All I can say is Ouch. Ego bruised, self-esteem down a few notches. But why? See I’m an intelligent woman. When it comes to helping others via counseling and advice, I know my shit! I’m accountable, smart, driven, an independent worker, I have all the qualities that make me a good employee. Yet they still said “no”. So why is it that knowing my self worth I still find myself struggling to deal with the rejection? Simple- I AM HUMAN! and my need for acceptance and to prove I am smart enough and good enough never fails. But somewhere in the back of my mind I KNOW I am good enough. I am good enough for the job, the man, my kids, and most of all myself. Like everyone else, I struggle with the concept of self-acceptance too. A few months ago my therapist asked me to compile a list of things “I liked about myself” and my list consisted of one thing- I am smart. That was it, I then proceeded to write a list of things I didn’t like about myself (something she didn’t ask me to do, but self-criticism is easy). There were 17 things on that list. See, I didn’t see it then but I see it now, my list should have been 17 things I like about myself and one thing that I don’t. My self-worth was ZERO! Since then I have found more things to add on my list and i’ve been able to remove things off the other self hating list. And that’s what life is dear readers, Its a series of plus’s and minuses. Up’s and Down’s, highs and lows. The point of this is, the more we accept ourselves the less the opinions of others will dictate our self worth. I mean can you imagine, If I let the actions of my ex determine my self worth? I’ve let that happen before, and the only place it got me was severely depressed, borderline suicidal, and a raging anxiety problem, not too mention tons of medication. My climb up from rock bottom? Like i’ve said in my past blogs, it was anything but pretty! But like all other goals I have been able to achieve, self-acceptance and self-love is something else I strive for daily. And thanks to a great group of friends and a great therapist, I learn to like myself more and more everyday. I learn to be kind to myself, because  the world isn’t always kind, I also learn to cut myself some slack! To freely say “I fuck up” and “so the fuck what?!” And so should you dear reader, so should you. See you are unique in all your ways, and that’s what makes you amazing! So I leave you with this:

“The most dangerous woman of  all is the one who refuses to rely on your sword to save her, Because she carries her OWN”

Love you all,

-A

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